Blind Faith
by Limmenel
Summary: Sequel to "We Are Human". Shepard pays Miranda a visit in her office, following up on their unusual encounter in the commander's quarters. Miranda struggles to come to terms with her resignation from Cerberus and loss of faith in the Illusive Man.


Title: Blind Faith

Author: Limmenel

Rating: T

Pairings: FemShep/Jacob; FemShep/Miranda friendship, possibly implied romantic beginnings.

Summary: Sequel to "We Are Human". Shepard pays Miranda a visit in her office, following up on their unusual encounter in the commander's quarters. Miranda struggles to come to terms with her resignation from Cerberus and loss of faith in the Illusive Man.

Author's Notes: I decided that I would carry on the story but written as individual one-shots. I felt that with the ending of "We Are Human", it didn't feel right to add another chapter, so here is the sequel, albeit a tad shorter since this was written at 3am. Deaths of characters are unrelated to the end of the game as I played it, I merely chose characters that worked into the plot. As mention in the prequel's author note: Anything I write will be based purely off of ME2 and whatever was hinted at or I read in the wiki about the first game. I only own a PS3 and a Macbook so I am unable to play ME1 at this time.

Please review. Reviews make my day and they prod me to continue writing. I am working on a longer fic that uses the same Shepard and almost directly ties into these two one-shots and the end of this one. I'd love to hear if people are interested in it at all.

—

The commander never knocked. Sometimes it seemed like she never had to. Whenever Joann Shepard found the time to visit her executive officer, the other woman was always awake. It was as if she never really slept and this proved true once again when Miranda looked up the minute the commander stepped into her office. She sat at her desk, console screens lit with text and diagrams. Straight back to work, that was how Miranda knew to operate. Work never stopped, not for long, no matter what had happened in the past 24 hours.

Shepard had left her executive officer with Doctor Chakwas. While it seemed Miranda had not wanted to go alone, having her commander see whatever extent to her injuries had never been part of the plan, so Shepard left her to it. Instead of heading back to bed as she had originally expected, Shepard found herself wandering the decks. It seemed, in spite of their exhaustion, each member of her squad were all very much awake.

Shepard exchanged words with some. With others, she only exchanged glances. The whole ship appeared to be in a state of shock. She had a feeling that would be the main reason for many sleepless nights.

Shepard had made sure her crew had been aware that they were on a suicide mission. They had all been prepared, even if scared, for the very likely scenario where they would not be returning to their homes again or see their families. Some had met their deaths. Others, however, were stunned that they had stepped foot aboard the Normandy again. Shepard ran into Kasumi in the mess, where the younger woman leaned against a counter.

"I never thought I would miss the food but now that he's gone…" she stopped, looking around as if the mess sergeant would suddenly appear to prepare them a less than satisfactory meal. His quality ingredients had only lasted so long. Shepard nodded slowly in agreement.

Her next stop was where Shepard found herself face to face with Jack. Since her earlier outburst, the biotic had calmed significantly but still looked angry. Shepard had never really gotten the chance to form a real friendship with Jack. Their relationship bordered on mutual respect but Shepard found it incredibly hard to tell. Either way, Jack's eyes burned with hatred and the commander could not tell if it were directed at her or not. Jack stormed off without saying a word.

The hours had passed and when Shepard passed by the medical bay for the tenth time during her aimless rounds. She popped her head in to check on Miranda, only to be told the dark haired woman had left awhile ago. Shepard had not actually realized how much time had passed.

From there, she made her way to Miranda's office where she found herself once again in the present, faced with a curious glance her way.

"Commander?"

"How are you doing, Miranda?" Shepard asked quietly, the follow-up question they had both known was coming and had never really been necessary to ask.

"I'll be fine, Shepard."

Shepard knew to take the executive officer's words with a grain of salt. Shepard sat down across from Miranda's desk, earning a raised eyebrow in return. "Is there something you needed, Commander?" It was as if nothing had happened. Shepard tilted her head to the side and gave Miranda a look that plainly said she wanted to talk.

In the wake of all that had happened during the 'suicide mission' none of the crew had expected to survive, Shepard had found herself wondering what was next. Now, as she sat in front of the woman who had previously had a lifelong career ahead of her, she knew Miranda would be undoubtedly wondering the same thing.

"I appreciate what you did."

Miranda had gone back to her work, eyes scanning the text on her monitors but only half-heartedly. She was going over old Cerberus correspondence. Already, her access to certain servers and information had been blocked. She looked up again when Shepard acknowledged the one thing that was on both of their minds. Miranda began to nod but stopped herself. Shepard caught the motion and something in her eyes asked for Miranda to explain.

The ex-Cerberus operative hesitated. Then she looked to Shepard with a surprising expression on her face. She was regarding the commander with a look that seemed completely lost. As if she were asking for guidance. "I want to know I did the right thing, Shepard," she started, confirming Shepard's suspicions. "I want to know I didn't just throw my life away with blind faith."

Miranda stood and turned away, toward her quarters in the back of the office. "You're always so sure, Shepard, that what you're doing is right. You and the Illusive Man aren't so different in that regard."

Shepard stiffened slightly at the comparison to Cerberus' ruthless leader. Miranda let out a small, wry laugh and looked at Shepard over her shoulder, half of her face and sad smile hidden by her long hair.

"I admired him. When I ran from my father, I was so sure that there was nowhere I could hide from him, that I would never be safe anywhere. I thought my life would always be controlled by my father, the way he planned. But the Illusive Man had a way of assuring people that way he offered was trustworthy. In a way, he offered me sanctuary and a new future. I blindly followed, just wanting to escape from my father.

"And now I find myself following blindly again. I've left that future I had been promised. I believed in the Illusive Man and the idea of advancing humanity and I had it all figured out. I felt like it was right for so long and I let myself trust the Illusive Man. Now I'm letting myself trust you. You're so certain that you're doing what's right for not only humanity but the whole galaxy. You make your own rules and you make the things you want happen. I've only ever followed what others set out for me and I don't even know what's right for myself. You say you appreciate what I did but what did I really do?"

Shepard remained silent. It was the most she had ever heard Miranda confess so honestly. Even after saving Oriana and hearing about Miranda's past and insecurities in brief, Miranda had only ever allowed herself small moments of vulnerability, like earlier in the commander's quarters. The executive officer trusted her commander. Miranda trusted her friend. Shepard smiled.

"Miranda, do you feel guilty for resigning from Cerberus?" Shepard asked gently.

Miranda paused to think about it. "Yes… and no. I followed you through the Omega 4 Relay, Shepard. At first it was just orders and my duty to Cerberus and this ship. However, you have gone out of your way to help me. I didn't go through that relay for Cerberus after what happened on Illium. I… I would like to think that my resignation was along the same lines. It was difficult to do but I would do it again. After all you've done for me, Commander, I owed you that much."

Shepard smiled again but shook her head.

"Miranda, you don't owe me anything now but you just said you would make the decision to leave Cerberus again. That's not gratitude or a debt. That's what it feels like to make the right decision. Knowing you would do it again without hesitation. Maybe blind faith helped your decision but I don't think you would ever just throw your life away. You're too smart for that," Shepard explained.

"But I'm not perfect."

Miranda had turned away again and moved across the room to sit on the edge of her bed. Shepard stood and moved like a ghost across the room to join Miranda at her side. The dark haired woman did not look up at her. Shepard placed a hand on Miranda's shoulder and gave it a soft squeeze.

"No, you're not. The best people are the ones who make the most of their imperfections. I know your father expected you to be perfect and you disappointed him when you ran away. I know the Illusive Man expected almost as much and will be angry you resigned but if those are imperfections in their eyes, you should be proud. You're living your own life and you just made the decision to live by your own morals when the Illusive Man started getting out of control. That's a _good _thing, Miranda."

Miranda leaned back on her hands and looked out on the stars passing them by. She would never vocalize it in front of Shepard but suddenly she was proud. All her life she had told herself the only things she could claim as her own, not the product of her designer DNA, were her mistakes and here was one huge mistake in the eyes of the Illusive Man. Shepard told her it was okay to be proud. Maybe not all her mistakes were something to be ashamed of. Miranda looked down at her lap but was smiling.

"Thank you, Commander."

Shepard nodded once and gave Miranda's shoulder a final squeeze before standing again.

"I know it's hard to leave everything and everyone that's familiar behind but this was for the better. You can do more now."

Soon after, Shepard left once again, knowing that at least one of her crew was at peace with herself, at least for now. It made the whole dark aftermath a little bit brighter with the prospect of a new future ahead. Miranda remained sitting on the edge of her bed. Bringing up her omni-tool, she glanced through her email. Names of old friends and Cerberus colleagues littered the senders' column. There was one unread message with an old friend's name right at her finger tips.

Without a second's hesitation, Miranda erased them all. She would make herself a clean slate. She no longer needed Cerberus to give her a purpose. She had Oriana and Shepard and her own life to start. It was time to move on.


End file.
